Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Future living

We're right in the middle of camp week with 2 camps running concurrently. I get a sense of renewal in our midst but it feels like the effects will take a while to be widespread. I am deeply grateful to God for His Spirit among us. I cannot imagine what we'll do without Him.

I am so absolutely proud of the staff team and the planning committees of both camps. God has done something in their hearts individually and collectively and I can see their passion and dedication to follow Jesus and make disciples. They are such champions and I want to make sure they know it. :)

God's been reminding me that as a leader, I live in the future. That means I have to constantly tap into Heaven and get God's perspective, in faith, of what is to come. To pray things into being. To build people who will lead the way. I'm still learning to listen and discern. There's been a lot happening and stirring in my spirit lately. This is compounded by things that I have been hearing and observing around me.

But Jesus has sent the Holy Spirit who will be my Counsellor, and He will teach me all things and remind me of Jesus' teachings.

I am in good hands. As always.

yay.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Awe

I just had a most amazing time with God.

"I am the bread of life"

Monday, June 2, 2008

The day the bread ran out

It was Communion Weekend last week and I was serving bread at the Sunday service. After I had finished serving the upper auditorium and was returning to serve those downstairs, a fellow pastor leaned over to me and whispered, “There’s no more bread.”

My first reaction was a giggle, because it seemed quite funny to run out of bread at Communion, with about 40 people still lined up in front waiting their turn. However my initial amusement soon turned to a little worry when I realized we had really run out of bread. I looked at the two small crumbs on my plate and images of how Jesus fed the 5000 flashed through my mind. Did I have the faith to give thanks and continue to serve the people with the hope that the bread will be sufficient?

Meantime, Pastor Joshua had been dispatched to get bread. “Any bread from any where!” we said, and off he went. The next five minutes felt like an eternity as my colleagues and I stood there, wondering what to do. Pastor Daren had begun to bless those who were not served bread and requested they return to their seats. At that moment, Joshua came running through the auditorium doors, slightly out of breath and red in the face, but nonetheless, with some precious bread in his hands. Communion could finally resume. There was bread.

I decided then that I needed a cup of tea and breakfast to top up that exciting morning and so made my way to my favourite coffee stall called “Tian Yi” (loosely translated as “Heaven’s Will”). I told the shop owner, “One tea, less milk and sugar, and two pieces of kaya toast”. His apologetic reply shocked me - “Sorry, no more bread!”

“No more bread?” I repeated with faint disbelief. He smiled and said, “Yah, sorry, no more already.” I was beginning to wonder if God was trying to teach me something. I then decided that even if He was not, I was going to learn something from it any way, because it’s just strange to hear the phrase “No more bread” in a span of 30 minutes in the same day! (Not forgetting the name of the stall is “Heaven’s Will”…)

Jesus declared in John 6:35-40
"I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."

I thought about the days when there was “no more bread” in my life. When provision seemed to stop. When I seemed to be in lack. When the words “no more” was a common refrain. “No more time”, “no more money”, “no more energy”, “no more ideas”… I realized that those times had happened more than I would like to. My responses in those times were interestingly similar to what I had experienced on that Sunday, beginning with slight amusement and disbelief, then looking for a solution, followed by some doubt, then peace and always ending with provision.

When we feel like we don’t have enough, we will constantly look for things to fill up our need. However no matter how hard we try, human ways and methods will always end up falling short and we will face the three words - “no more bread” some day.

What Jesus declared in John 6 is so powerful. He says, He is the bread of life. And that whoever comes to him will never go hungry. Instead of turning to the ways of the world, finding our own ways of survival, embracing all that Jesus is – His teaching, commandments, examples, character – can guarantee that we will never have to run out of bread. He is truly more than enough.

And while “Heaven’s Will” at the hawker centre might say “no more bread”, verse 40 tells us that the Father’s will is for everyone who believes in Jesus to have eternal life. There is simply no lack in God’s provision for His children.

So a comical Sunday has turned into a teaching point and reminder for me. When I think there’s “no more bread” in my life, I must remember that Jesus is my bread. However I must feed on His words and His life, knowing that “whoever comes to Me, I will never drive away.”

While I will never know why the bread did not multiply that Sunday while we were serving Communion, I know that the “spiritual bread” that fed my soul through these simple events have nourished me much more, and given me fresh insight into Jesus’ declaration of who He is. Kaya toast may feed my body temporarily but I will get hungry again 2 hours later. But with Jesus, I will never go hungry again.